Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize