And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
