Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Randomize
