idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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