so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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