i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Come see our sink grown plant.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I got inside last night via doggy door
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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