So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
