Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
