There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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