Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
