The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
