I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
