hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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