Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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