Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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