Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
