he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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