I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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