I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
