Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize