Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
