I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
