Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize