Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
