When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
i think im in europe. pls send help
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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