The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Two words: blizzard sex
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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