I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
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