Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
sex in a hospital.. check
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
