I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
