Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize