My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I think I sprained my soul last night
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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