The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
