Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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