Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
