I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
