What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
