i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
