Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
i came on her dog
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
