Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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