gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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