I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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