Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
