Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Randomize