And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
