Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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