just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Acid is not a monday night drug
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
