So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
