At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I think your dad took our porno
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize