I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
