my room smells like sperm. sweet.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
